Body Language And The Art Of Listening Through One's Eyes:

Magic of Movements

It's no myth that those who understand body language better excel in their workplace and in their social circle because they know when to make the right moves. Managers, salespersons, teachers and many more use it in their everyday life to their advantage.

Let me discuss a particular case of a meeting between the company executives and the worker union's leaders over increasing certain benefits for the employees. During the meeting one of the executives passed a message that they should not give into any more demands of the union leaders apart from what had already been accepted in the meeting till then. While the union leaders kept on pressing for the remaining demands, they eventually gave up after ten minutes. Was it just some experience that told him to take such a decision? No, it was his knowledge of body language that helped him and his company to come out of the meeting on fair terms.

So what did he see there? The manager saw that one of the main leaders of the worker's union gave signs of willingness to reach to an agreement by unbuttoning his coat. Unbuttoning coat buttons during a meeting are signals of openness and friendliness. Of course the manger not only got accolades from his seniors but also a raise.

The way we speak and what we speak forms a very small portion of our dialogue. Majority of the conversation can be understood through a person's body language. An experienced salesperson always looks into the eyes of his customer to see his pupils. If the pupils are dilated then it means that the customer is interested in the product and that it is the right time to strike.

One of the best ways of understanding the feelings of group as a whole is by observing the gestures and expressions of all the members of the group. If the majority of the members do not have the same expressions then it can be very safely assumed that the thought of the entire group is not the same and of just of a handful of individuals. This way many managers have prevented themselves from giving into the unjust demands of the subordinates.

During a meeting or training program or a presentation you can very easily make out if a person is listening to you or not. If the left hand is kept on right hand and the palms facing down then it's a clear cut signal that the listener is interested in whatever you are saying. On the other hand if the right one covers the left one then it's a signal of disagreement or that the listener wants to raise a point opposing yours. If a person is sitting with his arms and legs crossed and gazing continuously at you without flickering his eyes then it means that the person is least interested in what you are talking about. If a listener nods his head then it means that he is interested and is encouraging you. On the other hand if he nods his head rapidly then it means that he wants you to finish quickly. If the listener narrows down his eyes occasionally or strokes his chin or pulls his beard gently then it's a sign of evaluation and that the listener is about to make a decision.

However, all said and done, one must be wise enough to read the overall signals and not come to any conclusion based on just any one gesture. It is the art of understanding the unspoken words that has given an edge to those who have excelled in their respective professions over others who believed the word of mouth.